Monday, April 7, 2008

the diving bell and the butterfly

To watch this properly, turn the volume on your computer up. Way up. There you go.

I can't get this scene from Julian Shnabel's "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" out of my mind. I could watch that hair blowing against the blue sky all day long. It just keeps playing over and over in my head like it's one of my own memories--which, in a sense, I guess it is. Anyone who has ever been young, driving in a car to rock music with other young, beautiful people while the sun is shining and wind is blowing has this memory.

The friend who saw this with me thought the film was hard to watch, but I found it completely life-affirming. If you haven't seen it, it's about Jean-Do Bauby, editor of French Elle who becomes a victim of "Locked-In Syndrome" after a stroke. His body is completely paralyzed, except for his eyes. Unable to speak, he communicates by blinking, eventually using this method to write a memoir about his life and experiences in his frozen body. The film captures some of the horror of his conditon, but also the amazing freedom of his imagination, where he takes flight through travels imagined and real, and revisits the richness of his memories and experiences.

I think what keeps me coming back to this hair-blowing-in-the-wind scene is that the mind so often drifts to painful memories or self-criticism, when it could more often drift to moments like this, of brief but perfect joy.

13 comments:

catherine said...

Once Abbie and her friends seemed so down, that I put down Roy's convertible top, turned the music up way loud and drove. It was transforming, and each of those girls have told me, now years later, it meant the world to them.

This also fits you perfectly, Lane.
Miss you

ali said...

Yes, please. This is wonderful.

Plus, that road looks perfect for a convertible. Sometimes I'll be on a road in my VW wagon and think, "I really should be in a convertible right now."

Dee said...

While riding the shuttle with some friends at the Sundance Film Festival and discussing whether or not we have a soul separate from our personality, this man was humored by us and told me to see Diving Bell and the Butterfly. I had concluded that even though personality often changes when our brain is damaged, it doesn't necessarily prove the non-existence of spirit remaining. One of my friends, I think argued that someone in their family with Alzheimer's was truly gone after the brain started to deteriorate. That is when this man told us to see this movie. I have been wanting to ever since, and especially after reading your post.
I think there are different levels of consciousness, and that personality expressed through thoughts and words is merely a tool our spirits use to communicate. In other words, we are not our brains. Sounds like this movie might demonstrate that.

Ashley A. said...

My first and only ticket occurred in this scenario, remember? I shouldn't have gotten the ticket for speeding but for the Billy Ocean that we were rockin'.

I'm glad you finally saw the film, I still haven't found it playing anywhere that works with our babysitting coop schedule :(.

JDM said...

Nothing beats driving with the top down on a sunny day. Everyone needs this moment at least once in life.

Lane said...

Catherine--you would think to do that. I wish I had been there.

Ashley--So many hair-blowing good times in the Jeep! Perfect example. I always felt guilty about that ticket because I think I wasn't very helpful. I do think we listened to Lenny Kravitz that summer a lot--weren't we a little cooler than Billy Ocean??

I would like to be in a convertible with loud music playing with everyone who responded to this post--and have been with several of you. Good times.

Lane said...

ps. Sorry about the terrible Russian/Slavic(?) overdub in this clip--it's the only one I could find of this particular scene on the Internet. I should've warned you to turn the volume down once they start speaking!

jamieanne said...

Crap, dude. I love this book so so so much. Should I say that again??? Sososososoooooo much.

I'm sending that (and a prized volcoino) your way!

ali said...

I thought the book was coming MY way. BUMMER.

{alison alfandre} said...

Oh Lane, this movie haunted me. I couldn't stop thinking about that one single piercing un-blinking eye of his. Thanks for your comments on my blog, btw. They mean a lot coming from you :)

{alison alfandre} said...

p.s. I loved the "facts" about you and Brit :)

Author said...
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Author said...

i loved this film... I also loved the book... it really does feel like schnabel captured the sensations of remembering... so beautiful.